The move

I think I completely forgot to blog about this!

Nearly 10 months ago, my husband told me about a job offer that he had from Philippines. With a nearly 5 month K in my arms, I was completely unprepared for a news like that. He had not accepted the offer by then but he told me that he was willing to move because of the perks that he would get. He was asking me for my opinion.

MY OPINION!?

What was I supposed to say? I have just settled in Singapore and dont want to move again? I have made such nice friends here and I am scared I might not be able to do this again? I have not yet gotten used to having a baby around and you are talking about moving?

In the end, I didnt say any of this. Instead, I just said that it had to be his decision and I will be happy with it. I dont know if he saw the confusion in my eyes or not but just a few days later he broke the news that he had accepted the offer.

We did not know how we would cope with the ‘moving’ hassles with K so just one month later I was on board on the plane, off to Pakistan so that at least K would be at ease. I stayed in Pakistan for 3 long months while my husband got everything packed in Singapore, sold the car, got an agent to rent out the apartment, move to Philippines, settle in his new job, find a decent place for us to live and a car. Amidst all this havoc, I remained in Pakistan, unsure of how long my stay would be and obviously with a ‘not so great’ time table for K. You know how it can get when you are with family. People have different schedules and you are kind of just expected to go along with the flow. They will never SAY anything, they will just silently EXPECT and you just know that you HAVE to oblige. K started sleeping at 1 n the morning during those 3 months!! Imagine a 6-9 month old sleeping soo late! The good thing was that she was still breastfeeding so I was not too concerned about her food. She remained a good girl and did not give me a hard time otherwise, no trips to the doctor and her chacha must have been relieved who has to see too many doctors already with the older brother’s kids wenever they are in karachi.

so finally, in March, I reached Philippines.

First impression: it actually is a lot similar to Pakistan. You reach the airport and you can just feel that! its not as organized as singapore and it can be a bit frustrating at times but usually reminds you that people have flaws and that is exactly what you should expect from them. Something which you kind of forget while being in Singapore where everything is too perfect.

Now the best things about moving to Philippines:

  1. The condo here has amazing facilities esp for Kinza with two indoor play rooms, a fish pond and plenty of space to play outside.
  2. There is a shopping mall just across the road with a super market where you can find pretty much anything under the sun. This means we are not super dependent upon the driver as we thought we would be.
  3. No, we do not live in a bunker and yes, it rains a lot here and flooding is a major problem every year but Philippines definitely deals with it in a way much better than Pakistan. May be because there is a lot more rain here than Pakistan and they have learned their lesson. I cannot compare with Singapore because for them having water on the roads as high as 6 inches is flood.
  4. The locals are easy going, happy go lucky people.
  5. It is just so much easier and cheaper. to get domestic help as compared to Singapore.

Negative points:

  1. Isolation: I had made around 6-7 really good friends in Singapore who were MY friends. Not my husband’s colleagues wives, not mommies of K’s playmates. Here i am still trying to make friends and have not yet succeeded as such.
  2. Formalities: Things are way too formal here. Back in Singapore, if you wanted to have some people over for lunch, just make something and arrange for paper plates! You could take your kids along and let them have fun. Here, you have to leave the kids with nannies because you know that your hosts would have spent the past two days just decorating the house and there would be a 5 course meal which you are afraid your kids will disturb! So you either leave the kids with the nannies, take the kids along and get stared at by everyone and not get invited later or u just decide to stay at home
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Happy Independence Day?

32 killed in Karachi over MP’s murder. 2.5 million affected by floods. President chilling in the UK. And begging. Mostly chilling though.

Whether I like her not, Fatima Bhutto’s tweet summed up the whole situation in a manner that can only be called complete.

Pakistan is going through a really tough time and the President’s visit could not be more untimely than this. During this one past week, there has been a plane crash killing 152 innocent civilians, the country is drowning in a flood which is most probably the worst in 80 years, an MPA has been murdered brutally in a masjid and the violence that followed has already taken lives of nearly 50 people already. And its not only about people who have died, what about the people who are still alive? There has been a financial fall out of all these events. The flood has hugely affected agricultural lands in both Punjab and Khyber Pakhtoonkhwa, 2.5 million people have been displaced and immediately need food and shelter, vehicles worth millions of rupees were torched yesterday in Karachi and businessmen have lost billions in the strike today.

And our politicians are happy justifying their fake degrees while our President is partying in London in his suite at Hyatt Regency where he has booked 18 rooms on the same floor where half of the rooms will remain unoccupied during his visit. I wish the President had listened to other politicians for a change!

Just 10 days later Pakistan will be celebrating its 63rd independence anniversary, but is there something to celebrate?

Random Update

I always hated the rains in Karachi because all they did was flooding the streets, converting them into city wide swimming pools, killed a few innocent people because they by mistake touched an electric pole and power failures for as long 15 hours. Now obviously this has nothing to do with rain itself but the way the infrastructure of the place is. Things got a lot better cuz of CDGK but they were still far from perfect. Its different here. The world doesnt come to a halt with rain and I find that quite impressive.

So, anyway, things are pretty much fine other than the fact that I am, for some reason, not being able to do anything for controlling my weight. If you are a guy and reading this post, dun worry, the rest of the post will not be about this. Just crossed my mind and I just kinda typed it ‘in the flow.’ 😛

Oh, btw, I have been missing PD. She used to do some really interesting posts and now that she has stopped blogging, I dont even know why she has deleted the blog completely. She has deleted her old blog too which had some really really good posts which could in fact be used for later references.

As for me, nothing really new. I am completely wailee as you mite like to put it. I have applied at some places for work, no luck so far. Its a bit frustrating in a way not to be able to do anything especially wen u have the time and the opportunity. Or perhaps I should say the opportunity is not really there.

Blog Recommendation

Here are two blogs which I have found quite interesting. You might like to check them out:

Muslim Reverie

Organica

Happy Reading 🙂

And wasnt it really true to the name of the post…as random as it could get 😉

Blissful Marriage

One day when Hazrat Aisha (RA) was spinning some woollen thread, she looked up to see Prophet (SAW) with a golden glow of contentment on his face, mending his sandals, sitting beside her on the floor. She praised him with a poetic quotation and he, never to be outdone in gallantary, kissed her forehead gently and said, “O Aisha (RA), may Allah (SWT) reward you well. I am not as much the source of joy to you as you are to me.”

we live in a society that revolves around the term ‘wedding’; be it social gatherings or tv serials, nothing is deemed complete without it. Our businesses thrive on this term: fashion designers, make up artists, caterers, photograhers and even carpenters would have been starving if this term didnt sum up the whole meaning of our lives. But how many of us look beyond this term and think of a closely related term which in fact is the reality behind the contract signing ritual: marriage. Sadly, very few!

I was difficult to be convinced to get married. When I finally did agree to get married, I knew I had chosen just the right guy. I had made a decision and I knew I could not let anyone or anything weaken my decision. For that I needed to strengthen my decision further which could only come through knowledge.

I was engaged for exactly 9 months and during this time I had to mentally prepare myself to live in a house I had never seen even in my dreams, leave the only country in the world I called home, call a new family my own and dedicate my whole life to a man I had met only thrice. This was all too overwhelming for me. Alhamdulillah, my susraal was always a relief and because of them I knew I was getting married to the right person. But, there were still people who would instill all sorts of negativity in me about my decision. So, instead of thinking about this all the time, I was able to find ample time to study about Islamic Marriages (interestingly, there is not much stress on weddings in Islam).

I am not saying that I had an Islamic wedding but I had a very simple wedding as compared to most weddings I have attended in the past few years. I wish I could have an even simpler wedding if I had not gotten weak. Some times you just have to give up cuz of ur own extended family’s cultural values. I wish I could have been stronger. I am not even saying that I adjusted to my new life style immediately, in fact I am still trying to adjust. After all, even water takes a while to calm down after its hit by a small pebble and no matter how much you prepare yourself, you dont really know how the experience would be until u start living it.

But that does not mean you should not prepare yourself at all. You cannot just enter the examination hall with no preparation at all unless you wish to fail. You might not be able to solve all the problems, but at least you have to make an attempt. And that is precisely the reason why I am doing this series of posts: I want to share what I have found regarding marriage with all of my readers, knowledge might give you the courage to initiate the change. If you are a guy, its a bit easier to be assertive in our society. Go ahead and be the change you want to see.

Next >>

The Birth of Pakistan

The Citizens Archive of Pakistan and Engro Corp, in collaboration with the Mohatta Palace Museum, are proud to present ‘The Birth of Pakistan’.

Date: 23 March – 23 June, 2010
Venue: The Mohatta Palace Museum, Hatim Alvi Road, Clifton, Karachi- 75600
Timings: Tuesday – Friday 10:30 a.m. – 6 p.m.
Saturday and Sunday 12 p.m. – 7 p.m.
Monday closed

Free entry for students

For the time first time in Pakistan, an interactive exhibit designed specifically for children will take young visitors on a journey from the Lahore Resolution of 1940 to the struggle to achieve a Muslim homeland in 1947 and explore the early days of the new nation as it struggled to stand on its two feet. This exhibition is however not limited to just children alone- It’s interactive exhibits are appealing to people of all ages.

The exhibit features a unique ‘train journey’ from India to Pakistan, recreations of make-shift government offices and refugee tents, a chance for children to explore the contents of a ‘sundook’ or trunk brought to Pakistan by a migrant, photographs and film clips of major moments in Pakistan’s early history.

Children visiting the exhibition will receive their copy of the first passport of Pakistan, learn about how millions heard about the Partition of the Indian sub-continent, first saw the Pakistani flag or heard the National Anthem. The exhibition also delves into facets of Quaid-e-Azam’s personality through the recollections of his friends, co-workers, admirers and supporters.

We also honour the contributions of Muslim League leaders and pioneers such as Begum Rana Liaquat Ali Khan, the first civil servants of Pakistan and the members of the Pakistan Air Force, Pakistan Navy, police and army, Pakistan Women’s National Guard, All Pakistan Women’s Association and Radio Pakistan.

This exhibition is just one of many community-outreach projects that lie at the heart of The Citizens Archive of Pakistan.

We hope you and your family will join us at the Mohatta Palace Museum!

To find out more about CAP, visit http://www.citizensarchive.org

For schools:

All bookings must be made one week prior to your visit
All schools must register the number of students attending the exhibition, the name of a teacher accompanying them and a contact number for the teacher. Please send these details to citizensarchive@gmail.com or contact us on 0332-3392004 and 0332-2541272. We can accommodate up to a 100 students at once.

Anarchy all the way…

News: Jeans, national dress outlawed at Bahria University

People need to understand that there’s a difference between a school and a university….a lot of the things that mite work at a school, mite not work even at a university which is known for timid students. This must be the beginning of true anarchy at Bahria!! I truly dreaded this. In fact, I did a post on this exactly one year back. You can read it here.

I wonder why I wasnt able to witness anything like this while I was there. Sad. 😛